Honor or dishonor?

'Now in a large house there are not only gold and silver vessels, but also vessels of wood and of earthenware, and some to honor and some to dishonor. Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from these things, he will be a vessel for honor, sanctified, useful to the Master, prepared for every good work.'

2 Timothy 2.20,21

The important thing is not what the vessel is made from, but what it is made for. There is no worth in a gold vessel made for dishonourable purposes. There is great worth in an earthenware vessel made for honor. The world turns it round and so do we. We place the importance on who we are, who we know, what we can do, who we can be. Even if we think we don't, we do. When surrounded by others, it becomes the most natural thing in the world to think of myself. How am I seen? What do others think of me? If I reason that the response is positive I feel good about myself and the situation. If the response is negative I reason it away as the fault of others. It should not even cross my mind what others think because it actually means nothing. Who I am in the eyes of others is not what matters. What matters is what I am used for. Am I used for honor or dishonor? For the good of others or the harm? It's one or the other. I either give or I take. What does it take to be used for honor? I've got to cleanse myself. God will not touch a dirty vessel. I must be clean to be of use, otherwise I am meant for dishonor alone. I have to chose to separate myself from the sin in my life, to step away and cling to God as the only one who can set me free and make me clean.

If I am not useful, I'm useless!

I long to be anything but!